B to the E to the E to the F
Whatchu gonna do when there’s no burger joints left?

Last week Cheap hits me up on iChat
But I was getting down on chopping up my hi hats
So now my phone’s ringing, and I”m like “Cheap, chill!!
You know I got you on the blog, and that I keep it real!”

He said the place is called Hache and it’s pretty new
I’d never heard of it but that’s the point of BEU
And with a few Google searches and some Yelp clicks
I’m rollin down Hyperion and Sunset

Boulevard knowing that the parking would SUCK
Even on the Eastside it’s gonna take luck
But lo and behold there’s a big ass lot
I wish I woulda known cuz I walked 4 blocks

Well back to the spot cuz I finally made it
Bout to get my grub on and maybe get faded
Cuz even though it’s fast food steez with the line
I see Alagash white on the chalkboard sign

So I get to the front, shorty says whatcha havin?
One Hache burger combo bout to happen
Hand cut fries with a house made drank
Add it all up how much you thank?

Just 11 bucks for a full blown meal
Depending on the burger that’s quite the deal
Strawberry Basil Lemonade in a cup
Checked the Yelp reviews so I know it don’t suck

So now I got into the courtyard looking for Cheap
I know the posses here cuz BEU rolls deep
I see my man James snapping away
Reaches in the bag pulls out my burger hat for today

Put this on bro, now strike a pose dude
I never saw the photo, but homie ain’t rude
So now that i’m decked out with my burger piece
Let’s see who’s satisfied with their meat grease!

Jerome hates the burger he only kinda ate it
I think it fell apart on him, he didn’t appreciate it
Binks ate three of em but shared with a friend
Her plate looked like mine, all empty in the end

The fries were mad dope, garlic sauce crazy
So much that nobody about to go and make babies
Veggies super fresh, like supa dupe fresh
Like no for real everybody said they were super fresh

So when you add it up, I wonder where they stand
Hachey burger, from the Orange Curtain land
Chef Mick was even in the crowd checkin in
i guess we’ll have to wait to see if they got what it takes to win….

 

Additional Comments:

I like this burger place. I like how spicy my burger was.  – Kier

I split the Karma Burger and The Roaring 40’s.  T’was tasty good. – Benjamin

This place is cool.  Burger was cool, fries were cool, my strawberry lemonade was cool, the patio was cool, but you what’s cool?  A billion dollars. -Chris Restivo

Great not to have a brioche bun liked the burger was not overly-compacted.  Would have liked maybe a little less cooked.  Burgers all had distinctive flavors. – Jon Hafter

Texture of the burger was a bit mushy… -Jackie Shuman

The burger had a very distinctive flavor that really focused on the meat.  The bun to patty ratio was excellent, and the bun’s crunch offset the softness of the patty nicely.  The burger overall was a touch bland, so I would get it with bacon next time. -Michael Sherwood

Habanero was the right amount of spicy.  Bravo! – Garrett McElver

 The patty was a bit soft.  They didn’t ask how I wanted it cooked.  But overall tasty and would come back again. Karma Burger -Sally Chung

Burger was solid.  Wish they had asked how I wanted my burger cooked. Roaring 40’s burger – Brian Litwin

Condiments exceptional.  Good fries.  Bun/burger were a little soggy. -Robert M

“I don’t scoot!”  I know everyone was raving about this, but this was totes medium.  The staff owner and manager were very awesome however. -buhbbeccabinks

 

Out of 35 total BEU members in attendance, here’s how Hache LA fared:

Appearance: 7.28
Patty: 7.55
Taste: 7.35
Creativity: 7
Bun: 7.1
Toppings: 7.4
Price: 8.35
Service: 8.6

Who’s the real boss?

Slim Thug – 4

Tony Danza – 12