Choice is the name of the game here.  But not so much that you end up with a burger with lima beans and hollandaise sauce (ew)…again, controlled.  Walk in, grab a red sharpie and fill out a form – choose your protein (beef, turkey, veggie, chicken or burger of the week), bread (pretzel bun, whole wheat, plain, brioche or burger bowl), spread (choice of onion, cranberry or chipotle mayo), cheese (cheddar, provolone, swiss or pepper jack) and their standard burger toppings of red leaf lettuce, sliced red onion, tomato and mustard pickle relish (all of which you can exclude from your burger masterpiece).  You also have the option to add the typical burger restaurant extras of apple wood bacon, avocado, fried egg, sautéed mushrooms or sautéed onions for a dollar extra each.  Hand in your form and 10-15 mins later they hand you a brown paper bag with your big bad burger in it.  

For my order I went with a beef patty (because as Jason would say, “it’s BEEF Eaters United”), pretzel bun (which is quickly becoming the official bun of BEU), chipotle mayo, swiss cheese, lettuce, onion, tomato, mustard pickle relish and avocado plus some sweet potato fries.  Overall, the burger did the job.  It was pretty big so I only ate half of it.  The pretzel bun was perfectly soft. To me, the burger itself was a bit on the pink side for medium, but I won’t hate.  Relish isn’t something I normally put on a burger and it turned out to be a good addition since the sweetness helped the burger patty which was on the salty side.  You can never go wrong with sweet potato fries, but at $2.75 I thought they were a little stingy in the portion size.  Oh, and let’s not forget the sauce bar.  They have the choice of traditional Heinz ketchup, their homemade ranch or homemade ketchup.  The ranch was great, but I say skip the homemade ketchup because it was more like gazpacho.  

Dinner conversation I documented from the burger gallery ranged from the random – “I’m so greasy right now because I got a fully body massage an hour ago” as stated by Frank P., to the philosophical by BEU’s founder Cheapshot – ”Veggie burger with bacon.  That’s some pimp shit”.  Angie of Angie and Joe had some strong thoughts about the burger saying, “it didn’t tickle my pickle” to which Joe added, “and that’s not something to relish”.  And on that note, let’s check out the scoreboard…    

Out of 25 total BEU members in attendance, here’s how Hole In The Wall Burger Joint fared:
Burger appearance: 8
Patty:  7.78 
Overall taste: 7.28
Creativity: 7.07
Bun: 8.57
Toppings: 7.92
Price: 6.28
Service: 8.14
Who would win in a fight? 
Chris Brown: 2 
Ike Turner: 10
Overall Rating: 7.63393 out of 10

Here are the comments from our BEU members about Hole In The Wall Burger Joint:

“It was a 27 napkin kind of night! I was going to try + make-out w/ someone but then I just had burger all over my face.” -Anny Colvin

“Got Burger Cut!  That was huge.” -D. Davis

“Fantastic buns!”

“Burger was overcooked, asked for medium, got overcooked patty.”  -Joe M.